choosing.YES.

Oh.My. lately I've been feeling the emotional weight of life.  I am wondering what kind of 'stretching' I'm walking into & towards in 2014.  It seems like I've had more days lately where my emotional energies are used up by the stuff of life & I become the milkshake that's empty despite the fact my boys are all still sucking up through their straws... (Loving the Little Years)

Certain trials leave me totally.worn.thin. but leave me wondering why I am?  What is it in the problem that parches my spirit & sends me scratching & clawing for something to hold on to?  My God is in control, but the burden in the moment leaves me aching, searching for relief.

How does a person look into the deep of disappointment & pain & fear & love, & keep their hands open??  To accept from God, what feels good but not what feels bad?

Job 2:10

"... Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?"

To choose.YES. as the answer.  Yes, God.  Your will God, & not mine.  You are God, and YOU ARE GOOD.  and I am loved. (AnnV)

It is a strange thing to let.go. & realize that you are not master of your own destiny.  As much as I'd like to be able to control my life, my kids, my home, I don't.

What a strange way to live this life.  To see ALL as grace from God - to count as blessing pain & anxiety & what feels like curse.

Phillipians 4:8

Maybe that's what you've been facing lately (son of mine reading this years from now).  Don't despair.  Don't feel forgotten or lost.  God.is.still.on.the.throne.  You don't have to make sense of any of it.  You don't even have to know that next step.  Accept what he gives, good or bad.  TRUST.  FInd ways to see Him even in the small.  Some problems feel big now, but won't soon enough.  Don't let the darkness crowd in upon you.

John 1:5

"The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it."

The LIGHT will always overcome the darkness.  Take heart.  Take courage.  Choose.YES.  Your mommy's prayers go with you, whether you know it or not.