eyes.to.See - servanthood

"... Serve one another humbly in love."

Galatians 5:13

Today I attended 'Family Chapel' at my sons' preschool, and their scripture memory verse for October is Galatians 5:13.  

(The precious child that volunteered to recite the verse said, "Love one another in Love" Ephesians 5:13!  I loved 'her' version for 2 reasons: First, how fitting that we should actually love one another out of love, not for them but for our savior.  Isn't that why we serve?  Second, Galatians, Ephesians, she was so close.  Biblical neighbors.  This was a rabbit trail in its entirety)

Serve.  Service.  Servanthood.

I try to teach my sons that their Daddy goes to work to provide for our needs.  That we need money to buy food & clothes & pay for our home.  Daddy serves us by going to work.  I hope that helps them understand that Daddy loves them & that Daddy sacrifices for them.

I try to teach my sons that I stay home with them to serve them.  My oldest son has I think a unique ability to be thankful for things like me picking up his room, folding his clothes, making his bed.  He actually thanks me,  unprompted.  I try to remember to tell him I do these things for him because I love him.

We are taking dinner to a family tonight.  I thought of them as we sat in the Chapel today & heard about how to care for one another & help when we see others in need.  I must remember to try & explain this to my sons today, and connect it to their scripture verse.  To try & point out how we can serve our friends in their time of need, in whatever way we know how.  We give to them because we love them, but also because we love the Lord who gave himself for us.

I hope examples that we are doing together as a family help make it easy to understand what it means to serve one another in love.

Lord, please help give us wisdom to serve others but also to serve one another well.  Help us to serve you first & foremost.  Let us give with cheerful hearts & not begrudgingly, for how are those we seek to serve to accept our 'gift' if we serve them without a loving heart?  Lord thank you for chances to have eyes.to.See & ears.to.Hear when the things in our lives match up to your words & teaching.  Would you give my boys eyes.to.See the gift of servanthood?  Amen.

eyes.to.See - courage

"Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord you God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."

Deuteronomy 31:6

I believe teaching our sons the meaning of courage will be another lesson that I think of as simple, yet very complex.  In so many things, courage & bravery are simply 'feeling the fear but doing it anyway'.  When we are afraid of what is to come, but we move through it anyway, that is courage.  Is it easy?  No, and there in lies the complexity.

Today I had new experience.  My son had a cavity. ((A CAVITY. (the horror)  HE'S FOUR)) I never had any cavities as a child, and simply put, did not consider them a threat to my boys at all.  I took for granted that they would not have any, because I did not have any.  I was not a disciplined child in oral hygiene by any stretch of the imagination.  It was genetic fortune.  

But today I was absolutely sick about taking my son to have a cavity drilled & filled.  One instance where it is very difficult not to feel completely guilty as a mother for this kind of 'causal' result.  The dentist very kindly told me it was a groove in the tooth, at a point where it touched the next, not caused by neglect.  Do I feel better?  I would love to believe that there was nothing I could have done 'better', but I don't.  (I was torn on writing today about courage or regret, the latter will follow).

My son (and in some motions his mother) was brave today.  He was afraid & did not like the procedure by the end.  There were tears, and thankfully I was able to contain all of mine.  I didn't want to make it worse for my son; I didn't want him to know I was sad or afraid for him.  Not that showing my emotions to my son is always prohibited, but in this instance, I felt I must be brave for him.  That my courage may bolster his courage.

I told my son this afternoon, as he rested up with a movie & a smoothie, that he was brave.  He said, "but I cried a little bit."  and I told him that it was because he was afraid, but did it anyway, that he was brave.  He gave a little giggle & grin, and he let he hug him gently.  I told my boy I was proud.

Lord, I am so grateful for your presence.  That you will never leave me nor forsake me.  That you go with me, that I might not be terrified.  Lord, I pray that my presence would have that effect in a small way for my boys.  That as I go with them, now as children, that their courage could be strengthened.  That somehow I could mirror that attribute of you Lord, that you go with us & never forsake us.  You call us to courage & strength, and to stand in the face of fear.  Lord that we may feel the fear, even in the small things like going to the dentist, and do them anyway.  Lord that you would continue to build my faith, and theirs too Lord.  Amen.

eyes.to.See - patience

"Would you just hurry up and learn patience already!?"

I find that sometimes teaching patience is one of the most testing activities for my own patience.  We do pretty well planning ahead when it comes to getting ourselves ready & out the door in time for our normal schedule.  We try to set our back packs, shoes, socks, & lunch boxes in the same places each day.  I've tried to teach my boys where these things go when we get home, so that they can be putting their things away instead of mom doing it.

But that morning when the shoes were put in the laundry room because they were covered in dirt, that time my own shoes were left in the kitchen, when the baby's paci chain was left in my bathroom, when the boys' cups for school were left on the table, and when the baby then pooped his pants.  Yeah, that time we were late.  And my patience was tested. and tested. and tested.  And I struggle not to get completely frustrated with all the circles I walk around my house over&over.

I think those moments are one of my worst success rates.  I am to blame because I did not prepare ahead of time, making sure all of our things were ready.to.go.  I am to blame for losing my temper & giving into frustration & fussing at my boys.  I feel the weight of that morning & it feels like failure.

I think the Lord has taught me something valuable in those moments, retrospectively.  That imperfection does not equal failure.  We did not meet the expectation of being ready on time, but we were ready.  Sometimes it doesn't alway get done the way I want.  Sometimes we are late.  Sometimes poopy diapers add that extra 5 minutes you didn't have.  But I haven't failed in achieving the goal of 'readiness'.  I just didn't do it quickly enough.  Why does that feel like defeat?

"Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one who is quick-tempered displays folly."

Proverbs 14:29 NIV

The great thing about this verse, is the it is alternately translated:

"Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who is quick-tempered exalts folly."

Proverbs 14:29 ESV

I find that being quick-tempered, easily-angered, quick to speak are all connected.  That I end up committing 'follies' in succession after I give into my temper.  I just resonate with the idea that patience is the equivalent to being slow to anger.  It is absolutely true.

Do my boys practice patience?  Yes & No.  They definitely struggle (like their momma) with being quick tempered.  I usually ask them to be patient when they are waiting for something.  Usually, their turn with a toy or waiting for their food.  The immediate needs of now are enough to cause them to lose their temper & demand whatever-it-is NOW.  Patience can be practiced up to a certain point, and then the battle can be lost in the last moments even though victory was close at hand.  Patience to me seems to be a marathon, not a sprint.

Lord may I teach my sons about patience through modeling it for them.  Help me to teach them how to hold on tight when patience feels like its slipping through their fingers in the fight.  Let us both become slow to anger & gain your understanding & wisdom.  Thank you for never losing your patience with me, but always forgiving when I fail.  Thank you that my failure to achieve my goals is only imperfection, and that if I can have victory through patience in the midst, that can be a victory in and of itself.  Amen.